Hey, remember when this happened? Some got-dang fool in Tiverton got all ignorant in the comments section of an online story about a kid starting a gay-straight alliance club at her high school, and some feathers were ruffled, including mine. Especially because this knucklehead is an elected official, and the kind of elected official who has nothing better to do than troll local news sites and make stupid comments to somehow bolster his self-distinguished "straight shooter" cred.
Well, yesterday his fellow Rhode Island Republicans made their caucus a No-Dan-Gordon club. It seems his hobby of being a blowhard online got him the boot, but not for his comments about the Tiverton GSA. Nope, it was the apparent bashing of fellow Rhode Island Republicans in similar forums, the details of which aren't being offered by the ones doing the ousting. (I spent exactly five minutes looking for something he said that may have been deemed derogatory to his party, and I didn't find anything, so I gave up. Already I long to get those five minutes back.) And so, in a state with only a handful of Republicans holding elected office, where they can use as many warm bodies as they possibly can, this guy got the ax. But you know who's still in their good graces? This guy! This guy got pulled over in Connecticut with marijuana in his car and cocaine in his system, and claimed the East Haven police were unduly hard on him after they found out he was a Rhode Island lawmaker. Because, you know, what a bullseye to have on your forehead, right? Everyone knows that local police forces in Connecticut have had it out for Rhode Island State Assembly members for, like, forever. It's like the Hatfields and the McCoys, people.
And so, to recap, to keep your membership in the Rhode Island Republican caucus, you may 1) publicly disparage teenagers trying to encourage tolerance and understanding in their community; and 2) get caught driving under the influence of illegal drugs and have the enormous balls to claim to be the victim of some sort of loony imaginary discrimination. You may not, however, hurt your colleagues' feelings in the comments section of any website.
Just so we're clear.
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